A Singaporean Comedy

Was at KFC's with my classmates for lunch. we were talking all the rubbish which i couldnt even remember. Then something weird happened. i saw a saint pats boy drop 2 dollars while taking something out from his wallet. then i was like " eh, that boy drop 2 dollars sia. " then, everyone was like where where? and everyone was looking at him pls. then, the boy unknowingly went on to buy his food, his classmate who was queuing behind him kicked the two dollar note while moving up the queue.

ME: oi.. go pick up the 2 dollars la. ( to classmates)
CLASSMATES laughs like crazy retards and stones at seats.
Everyone still looking at 2 dollar note.
about 30 secs later.

MR " I AM A TYPICAL OLD SINGAPOREAN" came and took the note with perfect poise and gracefulness, as if without a doubt that 2 dollar note was actually his. Walks off without even looking around. WAH LAO. No conscience at all.

Then, like typical guys, we start bitching about that guy.

if we put 2 dollar notes on the floor with glue on it, it would make a really hilarious video.

Salmon, signing out.

Look five times

My pastor said like 2 weeks ago that in Singapore now, We have to look 5 times to determine whether a guy is a guy or a girl is a girl, or the guy is a girl or vice versa.

Then, that day at northpoint, i go to the toilet. i walked past the female toilet already, then walk to the male toilet. then like, " eh, why got woman inside the guy toilet one? " `looks at toilet door. " ITS GUY TOILET WAD! " stunned outside toilet for like a couple of seconds. then, peek into the toilet, eh. all guys leh, how come ah? dun care la, just walk inside. then, while walking in, i turned back and look. WAD THE! its a guy. zzz...

It got worst. While waiting for a bus home, then was this fat fat guy who was like wearing a really tight black shirt, and a black silk scarf around his neck. oh my gosh. then using two hands to hold a handbag( which was obviously for a girl )

I think looking 5 times like not enough, need like alot more times.

Salmon, signing out.

I'm not racist! haha

Wad la, my classmates think i racist.

Just becoz i thought that indie rock = indian rock

and indie movie= indian movie

HAHA. i think my general knowledge quite limited. jia lat.

salmon, signing out.

Common test is like coming soon.

Fear. Stress. Immense Pressure. Just when you thought promos were just over. It jumps on you, leaving you defenseless. Common Test. Coming to a Cinema near you.

Ah, common test is like 1 and a half months away. that is really crappy. it makes me really jumpy. :( crummycrummycrummy.

Wonder why its called common test..

What bout.

Rare Test- since its like not common at all. twice a year only wad.
Wake up Test- to like wake us up from our hibernation period.
'i might as well go jump down' test- with 1 and a half months, wad kind of time is there to study.

Common test. As common as the common flu. Coming soon.

Salmon, signing out.

Suffering: Why?

My net lesson today. tot i'd share it here for everyone.

Why do we ask and question God when something bad happens? Or when a life is taken from us? or when things dont go the way we would want them?
Well, God definitely didnt say that our lives would be filled with only the good moments, there'll be pain and sorrow. and that in itself is a blessing.

1) God allows suffering so that we might have the capacity to enter into other's sorrow and affliction. We are able to connect to people who may face the same problems we once had, and give them comfort and counsel right?

2) God allows suffering so that we can learn to depend on him. We can depend on him to comfort us, like Paul in 2 Corinthians 1 who claims God the God of comfort. in the midst of all the rubbish he had to go through, shipwrecks and going to prisons, he was able to proclaim the goodness of God and remain steadfast in his faith.

3) God allows suffering so that we might learn to give thanks in everything. no matter how crappy our situation may turn out, we are assured that God will hear our cries of desperation and with a humbled and contrite heart thanking the Lord, God will comfort us.

Anyway, as a sort of conclusion, i would think that anyone is having it rough, compare your situation to Job. Imagine losing like all your possessions and your children in a minute. Or for those who dun have a Bible, think of the little children in Africa. Your situation may not seem as huge as before. Seek God and you find him. :D

Salmon, signing out.

Guitar interviews: Round 1?

School starts and i have like no time to blog le la. Whatever extra time will be like used for sleeping. ( while reading the Bible. sigh. ) k, so i'm going to like finally start this blog and keep it alive to the best of my ability.

So, today was guitar interviews for the little J1s. So i had like 5 girls and me in the panel. 5 crazy, insane girls. to protect the privacy of the innocent little J1s, we'll just refer to them by alphabets here.

so, in order to make the most of this once in a lifetime experience of tormenting little, freaked out kids. We arranged the room in a really funky way.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxx xxxx
xxxx chair xxxx
xxxx xxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Legend: x- table
and on top of the tables, there is another elevated chair.

Boy A: VS guy.. wad could you expect from them.. honestly. So, this guy without even asking him to take a seat, rushes up the tables and sits on his "throne". So, you can imagine like 6 ppl looking up at this kiddo during interview.

Boy B: another VS guy. band junior.
Sharon Tan: so, do you have any other commitments?
Boy B: no. i dun have any religion.
Everyone in the room: ??
Boy B: i dunno ma. wad if got some weird cult need to pray during practice hours on mondays.

Boy C: IP dude. speaks with ang moh accent. And as Sharon Tan correctly puts it, " crazy girls in panel thinks he is cute. " All the girls except sharon went completely nuts over this kid. And as our interview comes to an end.

ME: K, now we're going to show you something, and you have to rate it from 1-10 with 10 being the highest.
Crazy girls from S34: treetreetreewillfall, treetreetreewillfall, treetreetreewillfall, bu shan bu si, s34. ( that's the transcript of their class cheer.
Meiching(with a straight face): So wad do you think about it? and you have to be honest.
Boy C: erm. it was funny.
MC: but you were not laughing.
Boy C: i didnt want to laugh coz scared that you all will stop doing the cheer if i started laughing.

The verdict? 7/10. Honestly. even in my own opinion, the cheer isnt really good. oh well.

cheers.

Salmon, signing out.